Wacky Definitions
Father - A banker provided by nature.
Boss - Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Life Insurance - A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.
School - A place where Papa pays and Son plays.
Doctor - A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.
Nurse - A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.
Marriage - It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.
Tears - The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine water-power.
Lecture - An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
Conference - The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise - The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
Dictionary - A place where success comes before work.
Conference Room - A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.
Politician - One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
Classic - Books, which people praise, but do not read.
Smile - A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Office - A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn - The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc - A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee - Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience - The name men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb - An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher - A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death.
Boss - Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Life Insurance - A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.
School - A place where Papa pays and Son plays.
Doctor - A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.
Nurse - A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.
Marriage - It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.
Tears - The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine water-power.
Lecture - An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
Conference - The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise - The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
Dictionary - A place where success comes before work.
Conference Room - A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.
Politician - One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
Classic - Books, which people praise, but do not read.
Smile - A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Office - A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn - The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc - A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee - Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience - The name men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb - An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher - A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death.
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