Bits n Pieces

He said: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said: You wear briefs, don't you?

He said: Do you love me just because my father left me a fortune?
She said: Not at all honey, I would love you no matter who left you the money.

She said: What do you mean by coming home half drunk?
He said: It's not my fault... I ran out of money.

He said: Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way.
She said: Well, you succeeded.

He said: Two inches more, and I would be king.
She said: Two inches less, and you'd be queen.

On wall in ladies room: 'My husband follows me everywhere'
Written just below it: 'I do not'

Priest: I don't think you will ever find another man like your late husband.
She said: Who's gonna look?

He said: What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said: Turn sideways and look in the mirror.

He said: Let's go out and have some fun tonight.
She said: Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.

He said: Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said: I would, but you're never there.